Annyeong, my one sided love

This is about my 8 years one sided love. 

I never had one sided love this long before. I never know that I will keep my feeling this long. I tried hard to see another man but it didn't work out. Until now I'm still unsure about my feeling. Am I in love or just obsessed ???

My friends said before that I'm stupid that I still like the person that go out with my trusted friend and also always think of me as just a friend. I also know that I'm stupid. From along time ago when he dated my friend I always trying to give up and try to move on but it was the hard thing I ever done.

I tried to move on for him but I just made my final project delayed and I just stay at home for some months. I can't even meet my friends because I am afraid they will know that I messed up my life. 

For not looking so depressed I turn my self to korean freak and make my parents blamed my korean freaks that causes my messed live. I know I'm a korean freak but I'm not that blind with korean fever. When I watch korean drama, variety show, talk show, or other program I usually thinking about what have I done with my family and my friends are wrong but I can't see them to see my sadness. 

But now, I hear a news personally from him that he will getting married. I know from my friend that the girl is from different religion but I hope he will live happily and lovely. I sincerely congratulate them and I think I should, must, really forget him forever. I should move on even I can't. 

This is the end of my 8 years one sided love. Now, it's really end. 
Annyeong... 

Is My Dream Not Important??

For some reasons I never satisfied with who am I. I ever heard that people is a creature that never satisfied with everything they had. I acknowledge that almost people never satisfied with what they have. But I'm not satisfied with my self because I never can't tell everyone about my dream, my favorite thing and also my feeling. 

Why am I always disappointed all people around me, even though I always do what they said to me. Even until now I never done what I really want to do. I think maybe my family thought that I'm still too young to choose my collage before, but at that time I was 16 years old and I think I grown up enough to know what my dream or my future goal. 

I think make sense that my parents didn't want me to go art school/art institute in college because formal education is important for them. 

but now, I am a graduated of Engineering School and now I'm 25 years old but my life is still under control of my parents. I didn't hate my parents but I just wanted an independent life like when I'm in college. I really enjoy my freedom, I've done what I love and also meeting many great friends. I really missed those days. 

Now, I'm just an 25 years old girl that can see the world from Internet connection at home. Even when I meet up with my friend near home I always got a call from home that ask when did I get home. 

I basically feel locked up. I just want my freedom back, even I live just enough to eat and must be frugal with things. But I feel happy at that time and even make me thing to reach my dream as soon as possible.

I just want to ask to my parents this 3 question :

1. is my opinion about my life are not important?

2. is my dream not important to achieve?

3. is what ever I ever said are just wind blows that never heard?